Judging Others

Everyone has a first impression of anyone else they meet.  First impressions may sometimes be accurate, but unfortunately they are based solely on what the eye can see.  My first impression of my friend Joy lasted for quite sometime at the start of our friendship.  This led to incorrect assumptions on both our parts, and limited how well we really know each other.  In order to avoid misjudging someone, we must get to know them before developing an opinion of them.  We should seek to do what’s best for our friends.  A person’s outside appearance is not a good gauge as to what is inside their heart.

Holding onto first impressions can lead to dangerous assumptions about the other person.  We have a tendency to look only at what is outside, unlike God who sees straight into our hearts (1 Sam. 16:17).  For a long time, I only saw the outside of Joy.  She was talented, smart, and godly.  She seemed like the “perfect” girl.  This first impression of Joy intimidated me.

Getting to know someone before making assumptions will prevent unfair misjudgments.  After sharing my testimony with Joy, and telling her some of the things I had struggled with and that God had brought me through, she was compelled to share her own story with me.  It was then that I realized that Joy is not a superhuman; she is just a normal girl like me.   This helped eliminate awkwardness and caused our friendship to blossom.

When becoming friends with someone, we should seek to do what is best for them.  Philippians 2:4 says we should look “to the interests of others”.  This means we must be frank and honest with one another, and be willing to point out each other’s faults and hold one another accountable.  Joy and I have had to do this for each other.

It is never a good idea to form an opinion of someone based on their outward appearance, because we may often find their heart to be different than what is outside.  Joy and I became close friends once we broke down those walls of preconceived judgments about each other.  Then I saw Joy for who she really is inside, the way God sees her.

Is there someone you're judging?  My advice is this: get to know the person before you jump to a conclusion about them.  Talk to them.  Spend time with them.  Get to know more about them.  Often you will find people to be different than your first impression of them.